The Minister


Most people who meet me use similar words to describe my personality: low-key, easy-going, laid-back, or down-to-earth. The latter was once in my ministerial packet, written by the Transitions Director at the Unitarian Universalist Association. As a consequence of my personality type, I’ve typically had a bunch of friends.

Research calls this trait “likeability.” I feel fortunate to be likeable. I hope you do, too, because it means you can approach me to talk about virtually any subject without fear that I’ll get upset. Most people who’ve visited me in my office will probably confirm this. Try it.

I raise this to encourage you to speak with me directly, if there is something on your mind about something I’ve said, to include my sermons. You’d be much better off talking to me about your concerns than talking to someone else in the congregation. I may not agree with you, but I will consider your perspective. One-on-one is the way to go. We call that being “in covenant” or “right relationship.”

The other way, getting someone else involved in order to lighten your emotional state or confirm your feelings, is called triangulating. That might feel better, but it won’t help you and I be in right relations nor move the congregation forward.

On another note, I wish everyone a Happy Valentine’s Day. Whether you are partnered or not, it’s a good opportunity to celebrate the love in your life.

Self-love is a good place to start. I encourage you to treat yourself in a loving way; every day. If you are partnered, remind your sweetheart why you love them. Buy some roses, too!

Don’t forget to be here for our special Valentine’s Day worship (Feb 17). Both services will feature three couples talking about their relationship. It should be loving and fun!

Namaste, Rev. Xolani